Tuesday, September 16, 2008

A Lull

Tuesday morning here. I am more than a little annoyed at the whole surgery thing with my dad yesterday; we got there and they did all the pre-op stuff and blah fuckety blah and then, just as the doc was getting ready to do the actual surgery, he decided he should maybe read my dad's chart and CANCELED the surgery; dad is on Plavix, which is a blood thinner, so he has to be off of it for a couple of weeks before they will do the surgery. God, it was such a pisser. I felt so terrible for my dad; he was obviously upset, and had no problem with ranting about it once we got into the hallway, but he didn't say anything to the nurses OR the doctor. I was all like,"Dad, I know that it doesn't change anything but shouldn't he be made aware of just how big a deal this is? I took the day off of work and we both drove all the way over here from our various towns and now we have to do it AGAIN?" but he has become so timid, and it made me a little sad to see him shuffling out of the office like, well, like an old man. Then he wanted to go eat at Perkins. PERKINS! God, talk about an old person's paradise! Just as I had mentioned before, he knew there was something he liked there but didn't know what it was, and of course my sister told me every restaurant in the area EXCEPT Perkins (she later said that it is because she won't let him eat there if she is with him!). So I asked him what was in this thing he liked, and he knew, so it was just a matter of finding it on the menu. Surprisingly, we had plenty to talk about. For one thing, he has a Jaguar; it is gorgeous, a black convertible with all the bells and whistles (and he got it on EBay, which I for some reason find hilarious), and I have lusted after a Jag since I was a little girl so there you go, common ground. I told him people would look at us in this hot car and think he was my sugar daddy, which made him blush and smile. We also got to argue politics, which is always fun. All in all, I feel very, very glad to have been able to go spend the better part of the day with him; I did have an open heart, and was able to look at him with compassion and love rather than annoyance and resentment-what a blessing.

Let's see, I got home from there and called the Juvenile Probation Office about the class; we got in, and will start this Thursday. I talked to D. and told her who I was, and that I had taken er parenting class a few years ago and she totally remembered me; I don't know if that is a good thing or a bad thing. I also think my friend P. might have mentioned I would be calling, because she was already typing in the information on her PC before I even fully finished telling her I wanted to take the class. So, on Thursdays, Sam will walk over to Jacquie's after school and she will just keep him and Owen there; the class starts at 6:00, so we have to pretty much leave as soon as I get off work (Hannah and Eli will also be going). She is also going to take them to my house at bedtime and put them in bed and stay there until I get home; talk about going above and beyond! I think there will be nights where Steve can do that part, but I am not going to count on him-I know he means well, and I will ask him, but at the same time, I am still keeping the backup plan.

What else? On Sunday afternoon, the kids and I took the dogs over to this place called Freddy's Pond; lots and lots of room to run for ALL of them, and of course water. We had Steve's dog, too, so the back of the Blazer was full of these big dogs; Hallie is a Weimereiner, my Harley is a very large Lab, and Eli's pup is God knows what but she is, I think, also going to be big. It was so much fun; I know we have the yard and all, and the dogs are perfectly content to run and play there, but there is something so much more fun about a huge open grassy field. Eli's dog is a pip, I tell you; she loves the water, we discovered, and it was hilarious to watch her dive into it after the ball. She would either run and do a belly flop, or very quietly sidle in and stalk the ball. The only bad part about it all was going home and holding them all three down to put the astringent in their ears to dry the water out; all three of them have those long floppy ears, and I know our other dog used to have a terrible time with swimmers ear. All in all, it was just a really great time. A bit of peace and fun in order to restore and refresh us all for the coming week.

Eli is really complaining about the whole bed-in-the-kitchen thing; all weekend he was like, "Man, this sucks. I can't even go into my room and READ!" He did try telling Owen and Sam to get out and leave him alone, and I put a stop to that; "um, the kitchen belongs to all of us, and I am sorry that they are annoying you but I am not going to tell them to stay away from you." He also has had a problem with me picking out his clothes; apparently I am just not hip to which shirt goes with which pair of jeans-who knew. I also made him fold up a pair of jeans he wore yesterday and put it back in his basket to wear another day this week; they were not visibly dirty, and until and unless he is going to start doing his own laundry, I am not going to wash a pair of jeans that has only been worn once. Especially since he usually comes home and changes his clothes before he does his chores. Anyway, he has been a little bit grouchy about some things, but less so about others-I think it is all a process.

So. That's where things are today. It is another good day, though, if only because I am in a holding pattern for the moment, but not a BAD one; it's just a lull before the new journey begins, and I think I am just going to enjoy the lull while it lasts and try to use it to gain strength for the path ahead.


Melissa said...

Kudos to you on all of this. I gotta say that Eli can't be too far gone if he is able to stop and have a good day with the family. KWIM? Just stick to your guns and it should all come correct in time. You are doing everything right.

And that does suck about your dad's surgery. But the alternative? Not so good. But your attitude was perfect and it sounds like you made a good day of it after all. :)

Anonymous said...

So glad you were able to spend time with your dad with an open heart.

Glad the class (and coordinating childcare) is going to work out!

Anonymous said...

You sound way more grounded than you were before. So glad your zen moments are coming on strong.

FreedomFirst said...

Well, I know it sucks to go through all of that and then have the surgery canceled, but I'm glad you had the chance to spend time with your Dad. And I'm really glad things are not totally awful with Eli too. Good luck with the class. :) And I'm glad you had fun this weekend too.

Jennifer said...

I must have missed the post about your dad--I'm sorry his surgery was postponed--but I guess it's a good thing they figured the Plavix thing out!

It sounds like a great time w/ the dogs and like you are making some great progress w/ Eli!

I hope your dad's surgery goes well and that he has a quick recovery!

Xbox4NappyRash said...

A jag off eBay? that may be the coolest thing I've ever read.

Kori said...

I'm so sorry they couldn't do the surgery and now ya'll have to go through this whole process all over again. That just sucks.

April said...

I have to remember to enjoy the lull more.