Tuesday, May 12, 2009

I Have a Headache and Can't Find The Drugs

So do you guys all remember how we know that summer is on its way? With injuries of some sort? I mentioned Owen tripping (twice) and thrusting his teeth through his lip (no stitches, by the way. "They" don't like to stitch mouths due to increased risk of infection. I learned this when Sam did a similar job on HIS mouth, at about the same age). Well, I forgot to mention that Eli also got injured over the weekend, though in a much more harmful venue. He and some friends were riding dirt bikes and he flew off and his friend ran over him. Poor kid, both of his legs are a scraped, bloody mess, and this morning the bruises are huge and purple. He also has bruises on his butt, but he wouldn't let me see those. This is the scary stuff about having kids. I mean, the father of his friend was there with them, they all had helmets on, father is a teacher at the school and the boys have been friends for several years now. Still, in an instant, everything can change, and it doesn't always have an acceptable outcome. It is so hard to send them out and let them live.


Hannah was talking to me on Sunday night about boys, and her exact words were, "Why is it that the skinny cheerleader types get any guy they want, and the normal girls like me can't have that?" It breaks my heart. Hannah is a cute girl, she has a nice figure, she is sweet and kind, yet the only people who want to go out with her are the "losers." The guys who are in trouble, the ones who have three tattoos and 6 piercings, the ones on probation. I didn't have an answer for her, and even now, two days later, I still don't. When you are 16 and a half, it doesn't mean anything when mom says that in 5 years it won't matter anymore. It means nothing when you say that those football dudes, the cool guys, the ones all the girls want, aren't going to be any different than her once high school is over. I use Steve as an example; he was Mr. Popular in high school, the kind of guy that could have anyone he wanted. In fact, at his 20 year reunion, better than half of the photos shown in the slide show had him in them. 10 years later he was a drunk. 10 years after that, he met me. And he would not have EVER asked me to go out with him in high school, yet here we are. I tell her that kindness and intelligence and respect will take her a lot further than a short skirt and low-cut skirts, but it really doesn't matter to her at this point. If I could just give her a little bit of what I know, none of these guys would even be a blip on her radar.

***As you must know, I scheduled this post since I am not at work today. I am blogging from my sister's house while waiting for her to get home so we can go have a small snack. There are ingredients for guacamole on the counter, but that doesn't sound good. Meh, whatever. I just like to revel in the quiet house, truly. The drive was excellent; I love to drive, and it was a beautiful night for it. Hardly any traffic on the freeway, long stretches where the only image in my rearview mirror was the road stretching out behind me, and the same ahead. I have to tell you that the image of serenity and beauty was completely shattered when I drove into town. Not the buildings or the traffic, not the streetlights nor the dreaded Wal-Mart looming. No, what ruined it was the image of two extremely large folks driving on a motorcycle that was about half the size they were. Now, I am no petite little flower myself so it wasn't their weight that bothered me. No, it was what they were wearing. Dude had on a wife-beater showing his, um, muscular (because large and jiggly just sounds so demeaning!) arms and those rayon shorts with the slit up each side. Dudette had on some equally lovely shirt but that kicker was the white see-through shorts. Did I mention they were both rather hefty? Yeah. She was either wearing a thong or her undies were really, really trying to hide, because eeeew. Just-eeew. I would have closed my eyes had I not been driving.

On that note, I am off. As you are reading this, I am in the middle of a class for work, one on which I have to test at the end of the day. This is kind of a big thing, in a department I am not at all familiar with, so I am actually going to have to pay attention and take notes in order to hopefully pass it. I have this class and one more in order to get a bunch of letters after my name on my business card, and I really want those letters. Keep your fingers crossed for me, will you?

13 comments:

justme said...

Thinking of you right now Kori, and hoping the test goes well this afternoon!

The boy thing...**SIGH**. That sucks. Because yeah, what do you tell her? I don't know. I guess it is just something that all of us 'average' girls have to live through and learn through...I am finding out that while I thought all my guy friends never made a move was because they thought I was fat and ugly and just friend material, a lot of them actually DID like me, but were intimidated by me and thought I was too good for them. WTH. I have no ideas for you on that one.

INJURIES!! UGH, double UGH. That is something I am dreading...And L is proving so far to be a crazy little nut who is probably going to give me many, MANY grey hairs. I hope the boys are both feeling better soon.
((hugs))

tutugirl1345 said...

Good luck with your class!

The short answer for Hannah is that boys in high school just kind of suck because they don't know what they're looking for. It definitely takes a few years for them to start looking at you as a person, and caring about what's inside your head and heart.

MindyMom said...

Fingers are crossed and I hope it goes well for you.

Thanks for the parting image, btw...

Mnemosyne said...

Fingers crossed!

The thing about Hannah makes me remember being 16...but I think that you explained it to her perfectly. She's not going to hear it and just has to figure it out for herself. This post was so sweet, about your sons and daughter, about letting go and how hard it is when you have kids that sometimes you can't shield them from things even though you want to impart your wisdom on them, or protect them from falls and injuries. You are such an awesome mom Kori! I hope you do have a great day and get those letters!!

Lynette said...

Fingers crossed! Good Luck.

FreedomFirst said...

I'm rooting for you!

I have to laugh about the couple on the motorcycle. I think there are a few large people in the world who for some reason actually ENJOY making other people gag. I don't get that.

I know Hannah doesn't want to hear this either, but the reason losers want to go out with her isn't because of her looks. It's because they target vulnerable people and she is both at a vulnerable age, and at a vulnerable time of her life. I'm sure there are some who really do like her, but the tattoo guys and troublemakers are just looking for someone insecure to abuse. I hope she's smart enough to see through that in the end. I well remember that age though, and how nothing anyone can tell you really matters. I'm praying for you guys.

April said...

Fingers and toes are crossed - even though you're crazy for not wanting guacamole. Like, ever!
I forgot to ask you about the water damage in your basement. Did the LL fix it?
And I love you.

TnAHurst said...

FYI I didnt have anyone I wanted! I only got asked out to one dance because my friend was dating his friend and it was lame! But I did go to prom twice and harvest and a sweetheart dance. Its totally not hannah if she was a blonde BIMBO like A LOT of popular girls are then maybe she'd get what they get...a guy who wants to push her around...have sex with her and get her drunk at parties and maybe she'll flash his friends. Thats all that REALLY happens. But I wasnt like that so I didnt date the popular guys...come to think of it I didnt date anyone that was at Minico the same time as me! They were older or went to a different school! You make life what you want it to be! Hope it helps if you want let her read this comment!

Shiona said...

Fingers crossed for you on the exam. Having a bunch of letters behind my name on a business card is something I strive for.

A for Hannah I have no good answers either. Ironically I attracted the losers because of the opposite problem. After high school it doesn't matter but when I was 16 ny dad couldn't tell me anything.

Ronda's Rants said...

Good Luck with your test....I H.O.P.E. you get those letters on your business card....sending love and prayers!

Tara R. said...

Good luck with the class and getting those letters.

I had to kiss a couple of frogs to find my Prince Charming too. One day Hannah will find a nice guy or one will find her.

HalfAsstic.com said...

Well, what you told Hannah was exactly right. However you were also right when you said that knowing it now and knowing it when you're 16 are both so different. Bless her heart... and all teenage girls. I guess boys too, I just have no experience with them.
I will pray for your mind to be magically erased tonight and the image of the bike riders forever banished. ;-)

Mrs4444 said...

Did you find out for sure on the test yet?? I'm hoping it wasn't as bad as you feared.

Your advice to Hannah is perfect; very, very true. She should also be glad to be avoiding all the drama that comes from dating! Does she have a job?

Hope Owen and Eli are healing nicely...