Tuesday, February 26, 2008

Choosing Your Battles

For weeks, literally, I have been engaged in this ongoing battle on another web community to which I belong; I have been expending a lot of mental and emotional energy in an attempt to be both heard and understood, and have been up nights wondering just how I could make one group of people in particular stop and see the damage they have been doing...when finaly, a couple of days ago, I just decided that it wasn't worth it anymore and chose to remove myself from the community.

Am I a baby, as one woman said? Apparently so; I guess it makes me a baby to have my single-parenthood thrown in my face every time I make a reference to it. I guess I am a baby for telling this bitch that I don't want to hear her goddamned Scriptures every time I turn around. I guess I am a baby for believing that Gods to look like whomever you WANT Him to llok like, and for believing that with or without "religion," we are all kind of supposed to be nice to once another and care for each other.

I guess I am too idealistic, and will fight on principle; I think, though, that I am going to have to accept that it is true that one person can't change anything, and that we are all in it alone. I have decided that I am no longer even going to attempt to be a voice for anyone but myself, I am no longer going to try to defend other single mothers, nor am I going to try to open anyone else's minds. Me leaving that particular community was the best thing I could have done-if only because I shoul rmember that there really is no such thing.

3 comments:

April said...

You do have to pick your battles. I think the only thing I would add to this is to never say never...what's not right for you today may not be the right thing for you tomorrow. This single motherhood thing is a roller-coaster ride! You have to do what's best for you to have the strength to be the best mom you can be. And I know you're always in tune with that, and will always do what is best for you and your kids.

The Immoral Matriarch said...

Good. I'm happy for you - it's easy to become way too invested in online forums and groups, to the point where we really start caring what they think.

When you realize that oh well - they suck - things get easier. :)

LunaNik said...

I think I know what community you are speaking of ;)

And yes, sometimes you have to pick your battles wisely.

I'm so glad I wasn't around during that entire fiasco. It would have really gotten to me also.